Advice Sunday 25 February 1996 Do not focus too much on this physical reality. Or else you will be stuck on it forever and forever since man and time began. Wandering on this earth as a ghost walking aimlessly. As you feast on earthly pleasures of food, sex and whatever else takes your fancy. You'll weigh yourself down to the vibrations of this physical reality. Instead you can rise higher and higher taking the good from what this earth has to offer. To elevate your soul and mind to possibilities beyond this world towards higher planes unseen. Your spirit can evolve towards higher goals, the music of the spheres. Peace beyond comprehension the enjoyment of company for what they have to offer. There is more to enlightenment than contemplating on your navel. You focus on the pains and miseries of life on this earth. You defocus on the vanities and misconceptions in the pursuit of happiness of the idle rich. Between these extremes lies the middle road of living an average life in which you can relate to both worlds and learn from those around you. Avoiding the blindness of one and the pain of the other. Life does not have to be so cruel or so blind. If your perceptions are true you will help others see the light. By living your life carefree and caring with kind consideration towards others this world can be saved. If you look after - your spirit, your soul, your self. The Blunt Edge November 6th 1995 If this was a logical world We would be in Utopia now Where everything you do would be for a reason every effort put to good use. Industries would be efficient Caring for our environment The workers happy and well paid. Holidays aplenty - contented lives everywhere No litter to be thrown down No advertising, no slogans anywhere. Clean streets, tidy buildings happy families playing, no rush anywhere. People would greet each other with : "Be Happy - enjoy life." But alas it is not. We are not perfect beings We have vanities and vices in store. We have feelings that can be hurt Failings in character and talent Flaws here, there and everwhere Make up who we are. We can be cruel or be kind It is up to our mind? Shall we rape and pillage the world around us or build and construct. It is all within us the good and the bad. Somehow we realise good must triumph for bad to reign supreme We would live in a war torn world with shattered buildings and broken lives somehow surviving in the dust Is that how humans should survive? on this speck of dust? If you wish to understand this insane mad world we live on You must step back and view this world from afar from some cosmic viewpoint. What purpose does it serve? To live in such inequality Such turmoil, such strife. Life's important lessons can be learned in such trying times under such painful conditions. You value what you do not have You strive for what you yearn When finally reached you will value greatly your treasured goal. Me Alone 28th December 1995 Why am I truly alone I do not know. Am I so ugly to scare people out of bed and home. So boring I put people to sleep. Maybe it's because I'm so lazy and hopeless in my career. No money to spend No holidays overseas No future to save for No children to nurture and support No home of my own No car to drive away in. It's just me and me alone I can promise to give you. For many women, that is not enough They want money, security and a family Someone fun and interesting Someone to get along with. They don't want a conscience, a guide Some one to stay home with. A companion, a friend Someone loving on which you can depend. They don't want to face the truth No dreams to believe in No phantasies in store The cold hard edge of reality lights the way ahead. No illusions to confuse No deceptions to find. What you see, is what you get. As one reviews one's life One asks the questions : Why so much strife? Why such a hard life? Why such loneliness to endure. I am here. Come to me my true love For Patience I have no more. Enter my life now for it is bleak and dreary. Without you, I am weary. Tired of soldiering on alone With no friend by my side No one to guide me on life's lonely path. It leads to many dark places I have no light to guide me I need a kindred spirit with a halo so glowing to light the way, to warm my heart Where are you my love? I have been waiting so long for no one to knock on my door or call me on the phone. I would answer you with a smile but I don't live here anymore. My soul has passed on And it is just my shadow lingering here. Out of habit Out of pride It hangs around on earth Searching for a like soul. The Losers November 1995 Vanity of vanities all is vanity someone said. Beware of outside appearances for often they do not reflect the quality within. What is better? The packaging outside or the beauty inside. Do you like the parcel outside or the treasure within? Winners are winners losers are losers the two do meet. Without losers there can be no winners. The losers will one day be winners. Give applause to all the participants. To take part is good enough to have fun. The rat race is a race out of control it is not fair and measures are not there to keep it sane. Power corrupts those who handle power it all goes to their head, they forget their purpose here, they are not here, to help themselves but to help others help themselves. Do not judge others is a hard divine law to abide by. It is difficult to know someone well give them time to show themselves to see what they can do. some people make bad first appearances but the real person inside can outshine those in fine suits and manners. Winners or losers does it really matter what we are? We are people. ... 1996 My dear sweet lover whosoever you may be? I shall love thee true Let me count the ways I shall love thee fondly even though we are far apart thinking of the times we'll spend in the future together. I shall love thee for all time till the end of time for our souls share a destiny together. I shall love thee as a man his wife for love and romance is in our lives. I shall love thee as a star crossed lover one day our paths will truly meet. I shall love thee tender and sweet dreaming of times we'll spend together. I shall love thee in countless ways as a sweetheart you have captured mine being who you are, where you are. May we come to realise how precious we are to each other and those around us. May the day truly come when our souls shall shine in the glory and light that is truly ours when we are together. The Lord works in mysterious ways in ways we cannot fathom. But in the fullness of time the meaning of one's life will become known as we choose our lover our destiny in this life will take us to worlds we can only imagine. A peaceful life with contentedness on our lips and fullness in our minds. I shall love thee for all the rest of my days I hope you will realise this too that I am your one true lover who shall love thee truly. You are my one true love whom I shall love thee dearly. You are the dream of my dreams whether of day or night. You possess me entirely I know not how or why only that my soul is attracted to yours because of your aural light. Will you be mine one day as I pledge my life to your life. Will we live a life of joy and happiness that we have dreamed all our lives waiting for the miracle of love to happen. Will you take my hand and lead me to a world of peace and happiness as we enter the future together. Melancholy November 28, 1995 In a canyon deep below in the darker recesses of my heart lies life's darkest hour. The pain and sadness of my spirit and soul where everything is so distant and cold. I shiver and shake at life's cruel twist of fate and misfortune. What have I done? to deserve this? In sunshine, I feel cold my attributes are split apart I feel strange and weary too tired to battle on on the journey of life. All my confidence is gone for it is just me and me alone who has to live my weary life. To receive love's bouquet of roses of happiness and love You must reach out and risk hurting the feelings of someone you admire. To live among the peaks of starry skies aloft life's romantic hills Is to court disaster as well. You can plunge easily from the heights to it's depths within a day. Your love may turn you down, Change their ways and mind, Bringing sadness to your heart and makes you wonder Why bother starting a romantic relationship? For to be unlucky in love can plunge you into the depths of despair. It may last hours, lasting to days, weeks, years. Life's deepest depression comes and goes. I cannot stop it from entering my life for it is life. It gnaws at me, sucking the creativity this negative emotion: Disappointments, miseries, self-pity All conspire to attack me. What have I achieved in this life worth mentioning? Alas, my life is nothing but empty dreams, hopes, desires. My wishes are unfulfilled. I must face all this negativity head-on for it is truth. To live my life, I must face truth and continue onwards with no fears. If I were a normal person with normal resources and fears I would be quite mad by now with all the pressures and innner fears I face as a loser in this life. But I am strong my mind is inpenetrable to the strongest of all forces but alas is fragile to the weaker forces in one's life. Doubts can open up one's armour and doubt one's existence. Why am I here at all? The Message Saturday 9th September 1995 We are a lost human race Not knowing from whence we came Nor where we're going to. We don't know where we are now? We contemplate on the everpresent now. Extrapolating the future and the past from this time now. But what happens when you're gone? Will your wisdom carry on? Will the next generation Start again from scratch? The way it has always been, with few passing the knowledge on. Listen to the still voice within Listen not to your carnal flesh. There's more than physical pleasure To life on this earth. Listen to your voice within. Let your spirituality carry on, It is the real you. You can't ignore who you are Nor what you are. Live and breathe as you, Be your own identity. We focus too much on this physical reality Forgetting what is behind it all. The invisible framework The thought and design of it all. The spirituality of being. Mankind has created civilization but what about the natural world? That upon which, everything else depends who is the great master behind us The answer that will satisfy you Depends upon your beliefs. Do you give credit to Nature or a supreme being? And who has given birth to Nature anyway? Can you, with your mind comprehend it all That the universe exists around you. And it was no accident indeed. Your consciousness is a part of it. And it is not extinguished upon your death Rather, it is liberated freely. When you enter that space between death and birth Your thoughts will have power Your beliefs will shape the reception before you Maybe you will see heaven or hell It will depend upon your conscience and attitude Or will it all be a dull grey haze? For the non-believer in anything. But given time, you have eternity before you. The truth will emerge and you will be well received by those you left behind and those who have gone before. So remember this message, it will help you when you need it, a gentle reminder That help will always be there, if you ask for it. The enlightened among us, will know that life goes on. It is never extinguished There is no such thing as death The soul, the essence of us Changes from one form of matter to another And the earth is all part, of a grand illusion Where the important things are trivialised and not-so-important things glorified. This is not to say, we should trivialise life and living Life should be treasured indeed For our time upon this earth is very important to us. We have many things to do and missions to fulfill. As our world approach the golden age All this will be clear and verified to some extent or another. And no longer will it be knowledge to a few. To the non-believer all this is nonsense. But there will come a point, in your life and death in which you will have the chance, to prove and experience what I say. Keep an open mind For you can never predict, just what might fly in. When you are in an incredible situation. The imagination can take fly remember that thought has power And what you believe in can seem to be real What would you prefer? The real, or a card-board reality It will all be up to you. Misery mid-December 1995 My senses are dulled I am at life's low ebb I know not what to do or say My heart aches for you I like to be in your conversations not as silent subject but an active participant. Please don't talk about me but at me. I wait for your phone call that will never come Why do I scare you so I do not know Why do you scare me so I know not why? Why do you trust me not I can control my feelings If I must, I can. Your wish is my command I may not like it so My feelings do not matter Your feelings do. My life is misery being without you I long for your company any contact will do. Why do you cut me off I do not know why? I do not understand life's miseries Why must I endure them so. For You Ms. X Thursday 16 May 1996 I pledge to you my life my attention and committments I shall love thee for all the rest of my days and beyond - my love shall burn for you always. You are my life - my focus dreams, hopes and desires I shall stand beside you always. Your hopes, dreams and phantasies shall be mine too - for I love thee true. Maybe we'll raise a family together Whether by natural birth, adoption or fostering practising tough love and 'we do care' we'll show our children how to be themselves and live the world of tomorrow. We'll live out our phantasies together exploring our talents and interests growing in wisdom, fun and knowledge being happy in each others company. Content to watch the sun go by and the stars revolve in their courses. Time is the most important thing we can spend together. Happy being us. We acknowledge our differences and revel in them. Happy doing what we do together. It has taken a long, long time for this match in heaven to come together And it shall last forever as long as there is love in our hearts and keenesss in our eyes to live our fantasy come true. Do you not feel it my dear that we make a spectre together. There is much hope that our lives will change onto a happier note in which we'll climb a stairway into heaven Our dream life on this earth. I shall dedicate my life to your life. We should no longer live apart but live in peaceful union with our sweetheart. It is you I love my dear may we live together for many years and see our dreams come true. Nanoseconds A penny for your thoughts to know what goes on inside your head Can you catch a thought in mid-air Turn it around and back it down again? Mental gymnastics for the brain. To control wayward thoughts that brings no positive end. Or do they go hither and thither Up some unseen hill and down again. Going where others fear to tread Loosening the realms of sanity Never to be controlled again. A few of us have had mental breakdowns a timebomb for a brain. It's too easy to go into a deep depression Over a love lost gone far away. There's shizophrenia among us The cruelest of all diseases Turning an intelligent person into a madperson And changing back again to sanity. And what after all is the brain? A house for the mind Where your personality and soul reigns. Upon death it is released into the greater universe Bridging the gap from one form of matter to another. Another Message {written mid-November 1995} Most of us take the leap of faith that something is real though we touch it not. A lucky few have experienced this other reality secure in the knowledge they have been there and that it exists. Don't preach! Don't preach! The unconverted cannot be converted they must convert themselves. That is the only way to learn. It is a spiritual rule that you do not attack another person's beliefs unless by invitation to engage in some honest thrust and parry using thought and reason Hopefully logic wins in the end in which truth emerges victorious But are you wise enough to appreciate the beauty in truth? Beware of the faulty programming in your life We all have it in some way or another some blind acceptance of what the masses accept, without question Do not despair about disbelieving in what you hold dear these thoughts of yours, may be in need of minor repair a little adjustment here and there will set the wheels in motion again In which you are happy in your beliefs - come what may. What beliefs we hold dear, are our own. Phantom Zone Dreams are a logic free zone where the unconscious runs free There are no barriers of decency and rules Dreams can be a lifetime A movie life in a novel An epic surrounding and engulfing you It all happens between dusk and dawn A soap opera, starring you You'll live and you'll die in this dream world that you create. It all seems logical an experience so real when viewed from the outside in You'll marvel at the storyline, the characters, the passion, the pace the surroundings are so colourful. But when it's time to wake The conscious mind takes over Expecting to understand the fantasy lived It all starts to sound bizarre You've made love, you've died you've changed character you flew and visited old friends It sounds too weird to make any sense. A dream dreamt by the dreamer makes sense within the dream. In the cold light of morning it's just another dream over Interesting while dreamt but of no use to our ordinary lives. You've got to get up, have breakfast And do that homework you promised. And what was that about? About dreams? I've just had one didn't I?? I've forgotten it already, and so another dream is lost because it never made sense upon one's life. Prejudice early April 1996 Life can be so cruel as it is kind. Cruel are people who cannot see further than their skin believing they are the annointed ones. Racial prejudice they accept and obey out of ignorance and fear. They do not realise inside we are all the same sharing common genetics and DNA. Our blood bleed red our eyes shed water We eat food in common and pass out the same wastes. We are so much alike except for the colour of our skin? And yet our skin colour may match so closely depending on your race. We are all humanity on earth So why can't we share the pleasures of this earth And live in harmony and peace? Wake up, arise Evolve - comprehend - understand Be a part of the world we live in. We can advance far if we close the gap between them and us. How then can we succeed to meet the future together? Accept what is logical Crystal clear and obvious. Peace on earth is possible if we can find it within ourselves it can spread outwards like a giant rose. The Puzzle Box {written 1982?} The magician hangs her hat upon the floor, walks to the up-down table and gazes into the crystal ball darkly. She speaks wisdom to those, who can unravel the words. "To focus upon a problem with a microscope compounds the difficulties that lie without. A lot can be said about nothing and little spoken about a speck in space. To those who fear cats, black as night and shiver at howls of ghosts upon full moon. Who get the shakes and screaming meenies at the on-screen slaught of life and limb. Who cower at the sight of blood and organs unmasked. You cannot see beyond the skin of your nose! Trapped within your body with your mind You fail to soar to heights uncovered like those who revere in imagination's delight. No boundary is seen by the mind that wanders for no puzzle is left unseen. Fears are thrown to the wind and morals too. For we make them or break them when we please. The universe is our oyster, our playground Doors to go through Openings into other realities Who can guess the doorway leading home?" Answer: Death Birth and Death are interlinked along life's intertwined ladder. Reflections Thursday 11 January 1996 Words written without sincerity have no real meaning They are but letters on a page. Real emotions cuts through the heart slices and dices the meaning of life. Can we deal with our character our selves. Sarcasm cuts both ways reflecting on one who serves it. Joking can cloud an issue creating a smoke screen to cover the unanswered questions. Who am I? What am I? Am I kind? Am I sweet? Tinker, Tailor or Spy? Real humility is hard to come by requiring the humbleness of a saint. You cannot ignore the fact that we are all part of the human race. We must value each other for we are brothers and sisters of different colours and religions. Everyone's well being does matter You cannot let a family member down To do so is a disgrace. There is more to us than meets the eye more to us, than just our lives If we could see ourselves now a marvel from afar So much potential, with so much to go. Why seek the extraordinary in the ordinary and seek hidden treasure in ourselves? Because we do forget what is important. You throw away what you do not value You value more what you don't have. The human soul within us demand that we do what is required to make us happy in our lives to make dreams come true. To attain what have always eluded us the simple things missing that would make us smile. Run Silent Run Deep Don't be fooled by the quiet mild mannered person the light is hidden within a bushel Not for the world to see. There are various personalities inside held by a tight lease. There is a wild lion inside the Mouse Do not let it run free It will claw and devour you If you open the box And it may not return within. The Quiet ones listen with open eyes are receptive to the world outside they see and hear all and can process this information Whether they choose to voice their thoughts are up to a whim. They have no egos to satisfy No domination complexes They are safe and happy To have a companion alongside for the lonely journey ahead because most people misunderstand the emotions within. Old habits die hard It is difficult to change the child inside who grew the adult Do not follow the thundering crowd for often they lose their way There's safety in numbers is their cry When they don't see the cliff face below. Riches and fame are but a fool's dream Beauty on the outside compares little to the beauty within. What do you believe in and what you follow are all up to you. Do you choose sanity or insanity They are but two sides of the same coin Or do you choose to live life on the edge Able to understand the sanity in the insane and the insane amongst the sane? Confused? Don't be! Life is a dream in a waking state. Broaden your mind, grasp that which requires your imagination Your brain may enlarge and possibly burst But after the headache you will understand One day in the future. Sad Song of Lost Innocence Friday 17 November 1995 You affect me with so many emotions I cannot count the ways Why do you haunt me so? I do not know. You refuse to talk to me it cuts deeply into my soul. Knowing that sadness are in our hearts. I would like to talk it over to know what your feelings are. I can live with you, not liking me I can understand that well. I will be the first to admit I am no prize catch in this materialistic world, but inside all of us are pieces of gold. Nuances of character and soul. And so it is - I surmise that part of me saw in you the pieces that do not change, our true characters cannot be lied to they are with us always --- we must satisfy them, with what they want worthwhile spiritual pursuits that teaches us life experiences : to be in harmony with others and within ourselves, to create beautiful masterpieces with words, music or pen strokes. We cannot deny who we are, nor what we are our characters demand honesty within ourselves We can spend our lives hiding only to wake up --- later in our lives saying 'this is what I should have done' 'all those years ago' 'doing that what I liked best!' Some hobby long forgotten, a talent laid to rest all because, we didn't fully appreciate our inner soul. Do we live in a fairy tale world with fairy tale dreams our mind - where we will wait forever for love to enter our world? I would like to ask you for your forgiveness I know that I have wronged you and I apologise to you trying to right the wrong. I am sorry to have lost you forever as a friend. Will you ever truly forgive me? Sentient Thursday 18 April 1996 It is time for truth and all the knowledge that this universe has to offer. No lies, no deceptions or misconceptions. Time to see things as they are Not dressed up in interpretation or complex words that hold no meaning. The human being is a vehicle the soul the driver. It is a useful tool to see this world, this galaxy from behind someone's eyes and see this world from the inside. Few can comprehend my words and understand the meaning. My train of thought the speed it runs the far destinations and how accurate and true the thoughts are. There is more to life on earth than mere human existence. The day to day living in which we all take part. Many believe the procreation of life is all important. That children are our future that part of us carries on. A vanity of immortality A misconception beyond belief. The truth is out there within reach and understanding. It is not taught but must be sought for your sanity and comprehension of what your life has to offer. What is your true purpose here? To live your life upon this earth. Life is a mystery make no mistake about it. To ponder about it brings it's own rewards. Peace of mind, solidarity the comfortness of being. Sure in yourself you are where you want to be and making progress in your life. Philosophy can be said to be a riddle to be unravelled that can reveal life's true meaning and answer every question we may have. We may never agree about what is true or is not? But still, you can learn much if your mind can understand it all. Comprehending may take a lifetime to truly be at peace and happy. The text I write is for those willing to read to open up their minds and comprehend. The insight you gain will be wider and wider As the seed of truth within you grows One day it will be very clear to you Your life upon this earth. The Sorry Tale - Remembrance Past early January 1996 I am sorry I never was the lover in your life I could never make your heart race or be your anticipated delight or go on long walks with you by my side. I was never relaxed enough to talk easily with you. You never had the patience to spend the time with me So that I can unfold to you and reveal my true identity. I am quiet, I am shy This has been with me all my life So exercise a little patience while I break my mould because I would like to show you Who I am truly. A caring loving person with kind loving thoughts. I don't know why I am attracted to you I see the beauty on the outside The beauty within. I like you as you are as you want to be. I would like to be by your side as a lover, as a friend. That is how a fairy tale should end but in this reality I fall short of being your dream lover a knight in shining armour with riches and courage in store with character and passion. I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for your company. It was nice to have known you I don't regret meeting you at all I am only sorry that I could not light your fire, light your flame because you have lit mine long ago. If we could not be lovers then can we be friends? I will always like your company in one form or another because I am a true loyal friend.